today i did the hardest thing i have ever done in my life... I will admit, for quite a while i thought i was in love with paul, but one day, about a week ago, the feeling just kinda left. believe me, i was very mad at myself about this. i kept telling myself to get the feeling back, but i just couldn't. i could not understand why i didn't like him anymore. i mean, he is the single most incredible person i have ever met in my life, it's as simple as that. but, something is going on inside of me that made me stop feeling for him. it could be because i am not ready for someone to love me yet, or it could possibly be that i am just not ready for a serious relationship, i guess i'm just too young. but, either way, as much as i didn't want to, i had to end the relationship. it just wouldn't have been fair for me to continue to make him suffer, i had to tell him what was going on with me. i hope he realizes how much i care about him and that i did this for the benfit of us both. i do believe that if the two of us are meant to be together it will happen in the future, but for now it's best that we try and get over eachother
"Cross my heart and hope to, i'm lying just to keep you here. so reckless, so thoughtless, so careless, i could care less."